In the future we'll all be gay
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
