Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
