8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
