My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
