Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
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