its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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