Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
i need some magic done to my vagina
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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