is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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