White coat. Heels.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
