You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
are you so shy because you have an std?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
you made out with another girl for some wings
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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