Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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