Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
