got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
