He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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