...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
