omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize