Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
