I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
