I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
