I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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