it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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