Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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