the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
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Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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