My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
