You smell like stripper and shame
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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