That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
