My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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