so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
false alarm, still single
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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