On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
