At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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