Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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