Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Mom said you looked used
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Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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