tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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