I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
