No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
love makes seman taste better
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Randomize
