i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
