So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
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