I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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