I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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