K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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