you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
How did I end up in the pool?!
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He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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