She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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