Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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