Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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