Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
