he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
