I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
this must be what syphilis tastes like
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Randomize
