I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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