Your face is a jimmy john
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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