i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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